GTANET staff member presses charges.

Tsuroki Tamauchi, content writer, journalist, editorialist and circle-jerker afficiando for the GTA Network has officialy announced that he is pressing charges against the GTANET community – specifically the administration.

Tsuroki Tamauchi will be seeking compensation from the Grand Theft Auto Network on Sunday for racial discrimination. According to Tamauchi’s attorney, Tomas Meat, Tsuroki had been “neglected and ignored due to his nationality {Canadian}, and had been left out of important updates pertaining to issues in the Network.”

“It’s bigotry, that’s what it is.” stated Tamauchi in a press release on Wednesday. “Just because I’m Canadian, they don’t tell me anything until the last minute. Hell, only Evis[cero] lets me in on the important stuff. I bet you anything, if I waved around the Union Jack and screamed out “CUP O’ TEA, GUVNA?!” they’d be on me like stink on Ashton Kutcher. But nooo… because I prefer loonies over pounds, and timbits over crumpets, they decide to ignore me.”

Meat stated that their client would be officially pressing charges pending a series of investigations by the FBI, CIA, IRS, IRA, WHO, NBC, PBS, SUV, MTV, UPN and FOX. When asked about the court case and the possible outcome, Tsuroki stated: “The only one who can beat my Meat is Evis – he’ll be the schlong slapping me in the face for this entire situation. I’m just going to have to bite the big one and hope I blow through.”

Good luck to Tsuroki, and a friendly reminder that Eviscero likes hairy old men named Craig, Steve, Ryan or Phil. If you fit the description and are not (repeat: NOT) a Vietnam war veteran, please contact him at 1-605-843-9862.